DARVO
Published Dec 2025 · Last updated Feb 2026
DARVO is an acronym coined by psychologist Jennifer Freyd (1997) that describes a common behavior of perpetrators of wrongdoing (sexual offenders, abusers, narcissists) when confronted. It stands for: **D**eny the behavior, **A**ttack the individual doing the confronting, and **R**everse the roles of **V**ictim and **O**ffender. For example, if you confront a partner about cheating, they might Deny it ('I didn't'), Attack you ('You're crazy and jealous'), and Reverse Victim ('You're hurting me with your accusations'). Suddenly, you are apologizing to them. DARVO is a highly effective confusion tactic that shifts the focus from the perpetrator's actions to the victim's reaction.
Common Questions
What is DARVO?
DARVO is an acronym coined by psychologist Jennifer Freyd (1997) that describes a common behavior of perpetrators of wrongdoing (sexual offenders, abusers, narcissists) when confronted. It stands for: **D**eny the behavior, **A**ttack the individual doing the confronting, and **R**everse the roles of **V**ictim and **O**ffender. For example, if you confront a partner about cheating, they might Deny it ('I didn't'), Attack you ('You're crazy and jealous'), and Reverse Victim ('You're hurting me with your accusations'). Suddenly, you are apologizing to them. DARVO is a highly effective confusion tactic that shifts the focus from the perpetrator's actions to the victim's reaction.
What does DARVO sound like?
Recognizing DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) gives you the awareness to step back instead of engaging with the reversal. Freyd (1997) identified this as a predictable response from people confronted with accountability. The most effective counter is a short, factual statement that does not justify, argue, defend, or explain. Lovulative's Text Script Vault ($24) includes boundary scripts designed for confrontational dynamics — providing clear, non-reactive language that states facts without getting drawn into the DARVO cycle.
Spotting DARVO in real-time saves your sanity. When you see the switch happen, stop explaining. Use the 'Broken Record' script to return to the original issue.
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